


we made these memories for ourselves

by 26stars



Series: Time Traveler's Wife AU [4]
Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: (about some heavy canon stuff including character deaths), (all canon deaths), (just a little), Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Established Relationship, F/F, Family Fluff, Future Fic, Graduation, Halley-verse, Major Life Events, Married!Mackelena, Married!May/Daisy, Multi, Past Character Death, Reminiscing, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-26
Updated: 2019-08-26
Packaged: 2020-09-27 01:40:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,653
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20399566
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/26stars/pseuds/26stars
Summary: Halley-verseHalley is moving into her own home before starting residency, and Daisy wants to give her a gift. Unfortunately, it brings up some not-so-great memories.Fills Smut Week prompt: Future fic





	we made these memories for ourselves

**Author's Note:**

  * For [agentmmayy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/agentmmayy/gifts).

> Ness, I know you didn't ask for it but thanks for your cheerleading this week, so this one's for you. :)  
~  
Okay, so this fic is definitely set in the Time-Traveler's Wife AU that I've poured a couple hundred thousand words into already, which I know is a heft commitment for a reader, but this fic will contain some major spoilers if you haven't read that one already. It also still includes some time travel that won't really be explained, so don't feel like you can just jump in for some fluff. 
> 
> If you're not worried tho, read on.  
~  
This fic partly came about because this week I finally watched Stick It, and I am now convinced that [the lead](https://loved-the-stars-too-fondly.tumblr.com/post/187183874338/filministic-stick-it-2006-dir-jessica) is what grown-up Halley (or any staticquake daughter) would look like. Change my mind. :)
> 
> Also I waffled for a bit over whether Daisy would be calling May "Melinda" by now, if Halley took May's last name, but in the end I just left it.

May finishes washing the last of the dishes and props them in the dish rack, drying her hands on a kitchen towel after rinsing the last of the soap suds from the sink. Switching off the kitchen light, she picks up her neglected mug of after-dinner tea from the counter and carries it with her to the living room.

In the half-dark of a late-summer dusk, Daisy is bent over the coffee table, a small box sitting open at her elbow and several squares spread out before her.

“What have you got there?” May says as she approaches, switching on the nearest lamp before sitting down next to her wife. When she does, she realizes that the squares are all photographs of various shades and sizes.

“I was wanting to pick out the pictures tonight,” Daisy says, though she doesn’t look at May as she says it. “Halley’s moving into her new place on Friday, and I wanted to give her a housewarming gift when we get there.”

“A picture frame?” May says, looking at the collage of faces spread out before them. “Or a photo album?”

“A frame,” Daisy answers, passing over a 5X7 photo of Halley’s headshot in her whitecoat, taken after her official acceptance to her residency at Chicago’s County General. With her first day of orientation coming up fast, Halley is getting ready to move into her first non-school home, an apartment they’d helped her find and sign a lease for in the past month.

“I wanted to make her a frame with this picture and…the other doctors in her genealogy.”

May catches up, closing her eyes at her own delayed understanding.

“Lincoln?”

Daisy hesitates before answering.

“And my parents.”

May opens her eyes again, realizing for the first time what pictures she’s looking at.

“When did you get these?”

“We went back to Afterlife once after…after.”

The pictures are in various states of aging, some yellowed and brittle with time, most of them faded and slightly warped. There are some printed on thick cardstock and some on glossy photo paper, but whether black and white or color, all of them look at least decades old. A few are laid out deliberately in front of Daisy, but there is a careless pile in front of May, so she picks those up first. Most of these are very old, faces of Chinese people in traditional dress, most sitting formally in front of a hanging backdrop and staring expressionlessly at the camera.

“That’s how you used to look all the time,” Daisy jokes as May studies a photo of a woman practically glaring through the lens at her.

“Doomed from the start,” May says, setting the stack down and looking at the few in front of Daisy. “So these were Jiaying’s?”

It has always felt wrong to say “your mom”…

Daisy shrugs, shuffling the photos nervously. “I found them in her home, anyway.”

From the lineup, she pulls one snapshot closer. It’s an old photo of a couple, slightly overexposed and not terribly in focus, smiling in front of a nondescript earth-covered building, its door standing open behind them. The youngest version of Cal that May has ever seen has a stethoscope around his neck and his arm around the woman. Jiaying has no scars on her face and is smiling the way people with hope for the future do. May finds at the digital date stamp in the corner—March 1987. Their daughter was not even on the way yet.

“This is the only one of both of them where you can tell Cal was a doctor,” Daisy says quietly, covering the sides of the horizontal photo with her hands. “He told me once that Jiaying helped him in his clinic, that she wanted to go to medical school, so maybe this is the clinic he was talking about…I wanted to find a vertical picture, but I can crop and enlarge this one on the computer…”

“You have one of Lincoln?” May asks, interrupting, and Daisy reaches for her tablet on the end table nearby.

“I found one from the archives of the hospital he used to work at before he joined SHIELD,” she says, scrolling through her photo cache. “He was in his first year of residency, just like Halley will be.”

She selects one photo and it fills the screen, a young man in a white coat with his mouth pulled into that kind smile that had been his most endearing quality, in May’s memory anyway.

“I never realized how much of him you can see in her…” May observes, picking up the picture of Halley and holding it next to the screen.

Daisy nods. “Yeah. I mean, I always figured he’s the reason her hair’s lighter than mine and that she’s so tall, but she’s also got a bit of his nose…”

“And some of his smile.”

“And a little of him here, around the eyes…”

May stares at the face of the man who is the reason they have a daughter, a confusing mix of emotions churning her insides. The dormant jealousy that has been redundant for decades now pokes its head out of the ground, but it’s accompanied by pride at seeing the miracle of a person he helped make.

Sensing something of her emotions, Daisy sets the tablet on the table, then reaches over and slips an arm around May’s waist.

“I know they aren’t…they haven’t ever been…part of her family, but she’s going to be a third-generation doctor, and I wanted to at least acknowledge that.”

“I understand,” May says quietly, sincerely. “I think they’d be proud of her.”

It isn’t a lie. They both know imagining any of these people in their lives today would mean a very different past for the two of them, a past that might not have allowed them to come back together and have the life and family they have now.

_But what grandparents wouldn’t be proud of their grandchild surpassing them in all the best ways? What father wouldn’t be proud of his daughter succeeding, especially in his field?_

Still, May feels the darker memories of these people scratching against the door of her subconscious.

_What grandparents leave behind memories so bad that their daughter never speaks of them…_

She sets the photo of their daughter on the table on top of the tablet.

“How much does Halley know about your parents?”

They don’t reminisce much these days about their early years together, before May disappeared for a gap and Daisy became a mother. Still, when it's the last interaction with Jiaying that drove them briefly apart and brought Daisy and Lincoln together in May’s absence, they can hardly pretend like those things didn’t happen.

“Not a lot,” Daisy says quietly. “Just their names, and that I didn’t grow up with them. I didn’t talk about them when she was little—your parents were her grandparents, and that was enough. And she was of course too young to really understand the answers if she’d asked where they are now.”

A pregnant silence stretches between them, and May has a feeling they’re thinking of the same things—the trail of death that brought Skye’s search for her parents to its end, the warped mindsets that had pitted them against SHIELD, the final conflict that brought it all to head. Halley of course knows her parents are SHIELD agents and has long since been old enough to understand that taking lives is sometimes part of the job. But it’s probably better for her to never have to know that her Mama is the reason she never met her grandmother.

Daisy opens the tablet to see Lincoln’s picture again, then lays Halley’s picture between his and the one of her parents. When she speaks, her voice is tight.

“Whatever end they had, whatever role they played or didn’t play in her life…if it weren’t for these people, she wouldn’t exist. And just because their stories ended sadly doesn’t mean hers will too. I want to believe…I want to hope that she’s going to redeem this part of the story.”

May is staring at a different photo on the table, one of a soft-eyed Jiaying with a dark-haired infant sleeping on her chest.

“I’m sure she will,” she says quietly.

May pulls Daisy into her arms, kisses her forehead, and holds her against her heart as she cries.

~

Two days and a full moving truck later, May is bringing up the rear of a train of people carrying boxes up the stairs into the third-floor, one-bedroom apartment that will be Halley’s for the foreseeable future.

“Do you just want us to pile things in the middle so that you can sort through them later?” Daisy is asking Halley as May comes through the door behind Elena.

“That makes the most sense,” Halley says, setting upright the suitcase she was dragging. “But maybe not the middle, since we have to get the furniture in here too. Let’s just pile everything on this wall.”

May sets her box in the designated area and immediately turns to head back downstairs. Elena tags along behind her, bumping her with her elbow.

“How are your emotions right now?” she says, a note of sympathy in her voice.

“They’re biding their time,” May admits, smiling over at Elena. “I’m sure it will hit me when we drive home without her.”

“I wasn’t expecting to cry when we moved any of the kids out, it just happened,” Elena says with a shake of her head as the descend the final stairs onto the street level.

“I’ll try not to rush it,” May says, holding up her arms to take the box Mack is passing out to them.

“Daniel and I are going to bring the futon up now,” he warns, hopping out as their twenty-year-old son pushes the large box their direction from inside the truck.

“Want me to follow and coach?” Elena offers, and Mack nods towards the pile of boxes.

“No, but you could always see how many boxes you could get up the stairs before we get to the door,” he teases, walking backwards to bring the long box out.

“You know I’m too old for that, but of course I still like to show off,” Elena says with a smirk, picking up a box and reappearing almost instantly with empty hands. “Actually, May, you should get up there. Someone’s there to see you.”

Brow furrowing, May hoists the box in her arms and climbs the stairs again, feeling another gust that she guesses must be Elena running a box up past her. At the open door of the apartment, she sees Daisy turning from the closed bathroom door, a disbelieving look on her face.

“Another Halley’s here,” she says quietly.

May quickly sets her box down, registering the conversation of identical voices happening on the other side of the door.

“Halley’s helping her get dressed,” Daisy says as May glances at the unzipped suitcase on the floor.

By the time the bathroom door opens, Daniel and Mack have made it up only half the stairs with the futon, and Elena has brought up three more boxes. The Halley that emerges first is the one who drove up with May this morning, but the one behind her looks nearly identical, only the clothes and length of hair differentiating the two women.

“Hi Mama,” the second girl greets May with a smile. “I came to help out. I’m just here from this winter.”

“And how is our first Chicago winter?” Halley says, bending to zip the suitcase closed again.

“_Frigid_,” the older one says. “That’s partly why I’m here—we need to plug up some holes in the walls before you start placing furniture.”

Daniel and Mack come through the door then with the futon, and surprised exclamations and quick greetings are exchanged. The older Halley takes charge, digging through the boxes in search of a pair of shoes and asking if anyone with a car can run her down to the hardware store to buy some caulk.

“I would have picked some up on the way, but I figured, clothes first…”

“I’ll take you,” May offers, reaching for Daisy’s bag and pulling out the keys. “I don’t know where we’re going, though.”

“Don’t worry, I do,” Halley says lightly, breezing out the door. “We’ll be back in a few, Meimei,” she calls as May follows her out.

Back in the car, Halley directs her back towards the freeway, naming a strip mall they hadn’t passed on their way in.

“How’s residency going?” May asks as she drives, unable to stop sneaking glances at her daughter with a few more months of wisdom on her. “Are you making friends?”

“Ha. In between the long hours or during the long hours?” Halley says, sagging back in her seat. “I’m not seeing a whole lot of anyone outside my coworkers.”

“Well, that’s something,” May says, taking the exit Halley points out to her. “Which shop?”

Back in the car with the caulk, gun, and a few other materials that Halley seemed to know they would need in a bag on her lap, May steers the car back towards the on-ramp.

“I also…” Halley starts after they merge into traffic, “Well, when I was on the other side of this visit, Jiejie told me what she talked to you about on this trip. So…”

Still driving, May throws a curious look the girl’s way as the young woman turns more fully towards her.

“I know you guys must have had at least a little conversation when Mom was putting together the gift she’s going to give me today,” Halley begins, and May’s heartbeat picks up slightly as she realizes where this is going. “I mean, you never talk about Mom’s parents, or my father, but you probably think that’s because Mom doesn’t want me to know that you had to kill her mom in the end.”

Shock makes May’s stomach swoop beneath her chest, and she actively breathes deeper, unable to look at Halley.

“The thing is…I already know that. I’ve known that since I was twelve. And it’s not something I hold against you, or would ever hold against you. If you hadn’t saved Mom that day, where would she or I be?”

May takes the exit back towards Halley’s complex, grateful for slower traffic.

“And the reason Mom doesn’t talk about her parents, besides it being really painful for her to remember, is because Mom didn’t want me to know what kind of people they became in the later part of their lives. It’s not because of you—it’s because she didn’t want me to know that any mother could ever hurt her daughter like that. That’s why she never wanted to tell that story.”

“But then how…how do you know?” May asks quietly. “You’ve known since you were a kid…”

“Mom started teaching me to hack when I was five. How do you _think_ I know?” Halley says with a shake of her head. “Andrea, Sophie, and I were messing around reading old mission files on our parents during a sleepover one night when I stumbled upon it. They’ve known the story since then, too.”

The parking lot in sight, May turns them off the road and finds another parking space—her previous one has already been occupied by another tenant. Halley is silent while she puts the car in park and turns off the engine, making no move to get out of the car.

“Thank you,” May eventually says quietly, finally looking over at her daughter. “For telling me.”

The girl smiles, a smile that echoes Lincoln more clearly than May has ever seen it. “It’s okay, Mama. We can talk it over sometime as a family, or we don’t have to ever talk about it if you guys don’t want to. But it doesn’t need to be a burden either of you carry forever.”

Halley reaches over and squeezes May’s hand once, a soft look in her eyes, then reaches for the door handle.

“Come on, let’s go stuff some walls.”

~

Five hours later, the furniture has been arranged the way Older Halley says it ought to be, all the clothes and curtains have been hung, the shelves and cabinets filled, and a first meal of carryout pizza has already been eaten around the table. Mack and Elena say goodbye after that, and Daniel gives Halley a noogie and a promise to visit later in the month to show her his favorite spots (he’s been in school in Chicago for two years himself). Younger Halley is running the full bag of packing trash down to the dumpster when the older Halley picks up the hammer out of the tool box.

“What are you doing with that?” Daisy asks as Halley picks up a pair of nails and examines the wall opposite the futon.

“One’s for the frame you’re about to give me,” Halley says, throwing her mom a knowing smile. “The other’s for something you’ll see in a minute.”

Two nails are driven into the wall before younger Halley gets back upstairs, and May and Daisy only exchange curious glances while they wait.

“I’m going to go ahead and leave,” the older Halley announces as her Meimei comes back in. She comes over and quickly hugs May and Daisy in turn, then pats Halley’s arm. “Try hard to learn everyone’s names on the first day,” she says. “And don’t agree to a date with Martin. You’ll thank me later.”

The older Halley smiles quickly at the three of them again. “I’ll see you at Christmas.”

The clothes suddenly fall to the floor, empty.

Halley immediately picks up the abandoned outfit and carries the clothes to her room, and Daisy shoots May an amazed look.

“I don’t know if I’ll ever get used to that.”

“Me neither,” May admits. “And if _I _can’t…

“I think that’s about everything,” Halley says, coming back into the room emptyhanded. “Do you all want to ride the L into town and walk around together before you head back?”

Daisy jumps to her feet.

“I have a housewarming gift for you, before we go,” she says, grabbing the car keys. “It’s down in the car—I’ll go get it.”

In the brief moment they’re alone, Halley meets May’s eyes.

“You okay?” she asks, and May remembers that the two Halley’s have also spoken at some point today.

May nods, attempting to smile. “Yeah, I am.”

Daisy returns with a brown-paper wrapped package, and Halley opens it eagerly, exclaiming over the three-paneled frame with sincere excitement.

“Oh, I love it! Thank you ,Mom,” she says, glancing at the two nails her Jiejie had put in the wall. “And I have something for you all, too.”

Halley sets the frame on the sofa, then disappears into the bedroom and comes back with two frames in her hands.

“I was going to get one made for my place anyway, and then I realized that we’ll never get a better picture of everyone, and I wanted you all to have this one in your home, too.”

Halley turns the frame around and offers it to them both. “I’m not sure if I should say ‘thank you’ or ‘congratulations’, but consider this an ‘I love you’ gift either way.”

Inside the frame is a large print of a photo from Halley’s medical school graduation, a picture taken out on the lawn in front of the auditorium after the ceremony. Halley is in the center of the crowd, grinning widely above the dark green hood that had been draped around her neck in the ceremony, and her octagonal black cap has fallen slightly askew, probably because of the amount of people embracing her from all sides. Andrea and Sophie are the nearest to her, grinning with their arms locked around Halley sandwiching her between them, but Daisy and May are just beyond them, compounding the hug and both smiling proudly. Fitz and Jemma are there on one side, and Stephen is tucked in the back row, since he’s managed to outgrow both his parents. Mack and Elena are on the other side with their two sons, who are also as tall as their dad, but while Tony is shamelessly leaning over Halley’s head making a face, Daniel is acting too cool to get in on the group hug and is just smiling proudly. Coulson is there too, beaming next to Jemma, and Trip and Gloria and their youngest son fill in the space between Stephen and Tony. Bobbi and Hunter are even there, filling in the back row, though their daughter was still abroad finishing her own degree at the time of Halley’s graduation.

May runs her fingertips over the faces, overwhelmed by the barrage of emotions that hit her at the sight of nearly everyone she loves in a single frame. When Halley turns away to hang both frames on the wall, Daisy’s gift and her own, May glances over at her wife. Daisy is biting her lip, tears visible in her eyes, and as she looks over, May puts a comforting hand on her back.

_We did all right, _she tells her with her eyes, and Daisy nods, smiling wetly and understanding.

Whatever family she came from, this is the family she got, and it certainly doesn’t feel like a consolation price.

“So do you like it?” Halley asks as she turns back around with a smile. Past and future look down at them over each of her shoulders, and the girl who’s always had one foot in each is still smiling. May smiles back and can’t help but feel like she’s getting a message from the universe.

The past is the past, but their future is looking bright.

“It’s perfect, Halley. Thank you.”

**Author's Note:**

> Raise your hand if you got the County General reference :)


End file.
